What do you really desire?

"The key to getting what you desire is to desire the right things."
Fr. Edmund McCorkell, C.S.B.

The above quote is on one of the Vocation Posters that hangs in the Basilian Novitiate House.  I've glanced at this poster so many times in the three plus months I've been here, but the other day, this quote really struck me, and it got me thinking: What do I really desire in life?

Of course, it's easy to think that I desire all the right things, that I'm doing God's will by journeying towards Priesthood, and that doing God's will is all that I am desiring in my life.  But, quite frankly, I know that just isn't so.

There are still times that I catch myself thinking about what it would be like to have a family, what I would be doing if I had continued to teach choir, and many other things that are different than where I am right now.  Am I really doing God's will if I am longing for something else while journeying towards Priesthood?

As I've given this some thought, I've come to realize that, sad as it is, this is normal.  Because humans are not perfect (even though many times we like to think we are)  We constantly must remind ourselves of our need for God in this life, so that we may dwell forever with Him in the next.  We must constantly re-commit our selves to being Disciples of Christ, and we must constantly keep forsaking the ways of the world.

But what a task this is!  If only we could have the faith of Bartimaeus, the blind beggar that Jesus heals as He is headed to Jerusalem.  Mark's Gospel tells us that when Jesus called to him, he immediately threw aside his cloak, and ran to Jesus (no small feat for a blind man!)  And when his sight was restored, he followed Jesus without a second thought, even though Jesus had told him that he could go wherever he wanted to.

This is where our desires must lie- With Bartimaeus as our example, may we put our sole desire in God, and learn to trust him.  How much more will God give us if we fully desire him alone, and we don't keep looking for worldly happiness, which fades like the setting sun?  God does not want us to be unhappy.  God is Love, and his love for us is the greatest gift we could ever wish for.  I cannot begin to explain how different my life is now that I am in the Novitiate.  I am united to the people of God in a way that I never thought was possible- and when I really start to think about that, I thank God that he has blessed me in such a way.

As we begin this joy-filled season of Advent, I urge you all to count your blessings, and to thank God for them.  And share some of that joy with others! It's the best way to make a difference in someone's life.  And may God bless you during this most holy Advent and Christmas season!

What is meant by "God's will?"

We hear a lot of talk in our society about God's will- especially as we draw closer to the November elections.  We hear people saying things like "It is God's will that Obamacare will be overturned!" or "God told me I needed to run for office so that His will may be done in this country!"

So what exactly is God's will?  Will in it's simplest sense is defined as a wish or desire. So therefore we can conclude that God's will makes up the sum of the wishes and desires for us, His people.  Simple, right?  On the surface, yes, but there is much more to it than that.  I'm not going to claim to be an expert here, but I just want to share some thoughts I've had based on recent experiences, in order to hopefully help others to gain a deeper understanding of the phrase "God's will."


The first question that one must ask is "how do we know God's will?"  The simple answer to this question is through prayer, and through the Bible- the sacred scriptures.  The Sacred Scriptures reveal to us the things that God wants us to do (or not do) to be His people, so that we may serve Him in this life, in order to be happy with Him in Heaven in the next life.  Prayer helps us to more fully enter into a relationship with God, so that we may come to know and develop a deeper understanding of what it is God wishes us to do in ALL aspects of our life.  And yes, that does mean that you can pray about relationships, struggles with co-workers, problems you are having, and the like.  Prayer is not just a memorized formula of texts that we recite until we are blue in the face with no real meaning or power behind the words- it is our one-on-one time with the God who loves us, and wants nothing more than for us to draw closer to Him, the source of true life and true happiness.


Secondly, we must understand that God's will is unchanging.  This is a difficult concept to grasp, especially in today's progressive society that is always pushing for change.  Man's ways are fickle, and are constantly changing, but God in his infinite wisdom has already ordained right and wrong from the beginning of time, and nothing that man says or does will make God change his mind.  Yes, humans do have free will, and we can choose to go against God's will for us, but that does not mean that we have changed God's will.  


We must also understand that we will often face ridicule for choosing to follow God's will- because God's ways are not the ways of this world.  But there is a happiness that comes from following God's Will that cannot come from the things of this world.  Because the number one thing that God desires is for us to be happy.  And if we follow His will for us, and allow Him to guide us, we will come to know Happiness- maybe not in the ways that we would expect, but in ways that God knows are best for us.

Giving this another go

I've been absent from the blogosphere for quite awhile now, and really it's no one's fault but my own.  I will admit that I kind of lost interest in blogging at the start of the year, but recently, several people have told me how much they enjoyed reading my blog, and asked me why I hadn't posted in a while... so I'm going to try to keep it up again- at least until I enter the Novitiate. More on that in a minute!

So where to begin... so much has happened since my last update!  I finished out the School year at Catholic Central, Got to visit Family in Indiana one last time before making a much needed visit back to New Mexico to visit family and friends, and of course, consume copius amounts of green chili (yum!)  It was also Wedding Central this summer... first, I traveled to Destin, Florida, for my younger brother's wedding. After we returned from Florida, I hit the road to Alamogordo, NM, for another wedding- this time for my friends Casey and Joe.  Both Weddings were a blast! here are a couple of pictures: 

My brother Brian and his wife (and now my sister!) Nichole

"You better not shove that cake in my face!"

Casey and Joe, and the wedding party

Casey and Joe's First Dance

Of course, I couldn't go to Alamogordo without making the trip down to Las Cruces to see friends there!  And of course to admire the scenery :)

I swear... this never gets old!

But sadly, all good things must come to an end... and after three short weeks, it was time to leave the Land of Enchantment, and move on to other places.  Hotter, more humid places- like Houston, TX!  I've been here for about a week now, and I can already tell that the humidity is going to take some getting used to... I've learned that you pretty much don't want to be outside for any great length of time during the middle of the day unless you have PLENTY of water with you.  I drove through Memorial Park the other afternoon on the way to the Retreat House we were having the Associate Retreat at, and there were people jogging.  My first thought was "are you crazy?" But I guess what makes desert boy miserable may not make the locals miserable... either that, or they are crazy!

So, many of you may be asking by this point- "Steven, why are you in Houston?"  Well, here's your answer. I am here preparing to begin my Novitiate year- a year of intense discernment and spiritual formation that every member of a Religious Community must go through to officially become a member of the community.  We learn about the Vows we profess, the Basilian way of life, different forms of prayer and Spirituality, and above all, how to live in Community. At the end of that year, we profess Temporary Vows, and then we will be able to Begin Seminary.

The Novitiate will begin in Mid-August, so in the meantime, we will be taking Philosophy courses at the University of St. Thomas here in Houston.  It should prove to be an interesting experience... I haven't taken much Philosophy, so I'm not quite sure what to expect, but hopefully it all goes well!

That's about all for now... I have some other thoughts brewing for a possible future blog that I will share later.... maybe it won't be so hard to get back into this after all!

Blessings in the Lord Jesus Christ,

Steven

I really should be better about posting here!!

I haven't blogged in forever! Mainly because ever since I got back from my visit home at Christmas, life has been crazy!  I've led two Kairos Retreats for CC, played/sang at numerous Masses, helped with a school play, seen our Wrestling team win a state title- and that's only the half of it!

I also got the chance to fulfill one of my life long dreams and go to New York City!  I saw the Lion King, Godspell, and I also saw La Traviata at the Metropolitan Opera House, in addition to going to Times Square, the 9/11 Memorial, Ellis Island, Grand Central Terminal- it was amazing!  I hope I am able to go back again some day, because New York is a great city!

I would also like to add that I have been accepted into the Basilian Novitiate, beginning in August.  This means that I will be moving to Sugarland, TX (a suburb of Houston) at the End of June.  I have enjoyed my time in Michigan greatly, but I am looking forward to the next step of the adventure!

It's been forever!

It's amazing how time can get away from you when you're having fun and keeping busy!  I can't believe it's been over 2 months since I've last written, but at least that means I've been staying busy!

So here's a rundown of what I've been up to for the past couple of months.

I began the month of November by going to Las Cruces to celebrate the wedding of two of my good friends from College.  It was a joy to be at Paul and Carol's wedding, and I wish them a life of happiness together!  It was also great to get to see so many friends from years past, and have a chance to catch up, even though it was just a very brief one.  But with so many people living in so many different places across the country, We sometimes just have to be greatful for the time that we do get to spend with friends, no matter how short it is.

Unfortunately, I didn't get to go to Albuquerque for Thanksgiving, but thankfully, my Grandparents live 4 hours away from where I am!  I was able to drive to Merillville, IN, for Thanksgiving, and spend it with my Grandparents, my Aunt and Uncle, and several of my cousins that I had not seen in a long time.  It was a great trip, and I very much enjoyed getting to spend time with a part of my family that I don't get to see very often.

I was able to go home for Christmas, and it was great to be able to see my family after being gone for almost 7 months.  It was also great to get some good New Mexican food, and some good green chile!  I was able to see many friends and people from my Parish back home, and it was nice for them to know that I am doing well.

I also went to Houston for a couple of days over Christmas Break, for a gathering of the Basilian Associates.  We went to the Basilian beach house on Galveston Island, and it was great!  There's something kind of strange about being on a beach on the 29th of December, with the temperature in the mid 70's, but hey, I'm not complaining!  It was a great reprieve from the (currently not so) cold north!

Still waiting for the first real snowfall of the year to hit... funny how this winter has been more like a NM winter!  Everyone is dreading what is to come though, because they're worried that we're going to get buried under one massive snowstorm here before too long.

School has been going well, and the Winter sports season is in full swing!  I've taken on the responsibility of announcing the Freshman and JV Basketball games, and it really is a lot of fun!  Hopefully it's something I can keep doing in the future.

That's about it for now.  More to come soon!

Imagine this...

We use this story on one of the retreats at CC.  I hope you find it as profound as I did.

The day is over, you are driving home. You turn on the radio in your car, and you hear a little blurb about a little village in India where some villagers have died suddenly, strangely, of a flu that has never been seen before. It's not influenza, but three or four people are dead, and it's kind of interesting. They're sending some doctors over there to investigate it.

You don't think much about it, but on Sunday, coming home from church, you hear another radio spot. Only this time, it's not three villagers, it's 30,000 villagers in the back hills of this particular area of India, and it's on TV that night. CNN runs a little blurb; people are heading there from the CDC because this disease strain has never been seen before.

By Monday morning when you get up, it's the lead story. And it's not just India; it's Pakistan, Afghanistan, Iran, and before you know it, you're hearing this story everywhere and the news media is refering to it as "the mystery flu." The President has made some comment that he is praying and hoping that all will go well over there. But everyone is wondering, "How are we going to contain it?" That's when the President of France makes an announcement that shocks Europe. He is closing their borders. No flights from India, Pakistan, or any of the countries where this thing has been seen.

And that night you are watching a little bit of CNN before going to bed. Your jaw hits your chest when a weeping woman is translated from a French news program into English: "There's a man lying in a hospital in Paris dying of the mystery flu." It has come to Europe. Panic strikes. As best they can tell, once you get it, you have it for a week and you don't know it. Then you have four days of unbelievable symptoms. And then you die.

Britain closes it's borders, but it's too late. South Hampton, Liverpool, North Hampton, and it's Tuesday morning when the President of the United States makes the following announcement: "Due to a national security risk, all flights to and from Europe and Asia have been canceled. If your loved ones are overseas, I'm sorry. They cannot come back until we find a cure for this thing."

Within four days our nation has been plunged into an unbelievable fear. People are selling little masks for your face. People are talking about what if it comes to this country, and preachers on Tuesday are saying, "It's the scourge of God."

It's Wednesday night and you are at a church prayer meeting when somebody runs in from the parking lot and says, "Turn on a radio! turn on a radio!" And while the church listens to a little transistor radio with a microphone stuck up to it, the announcement is made. "Two women are lying in a Long Island hospital dying from the mystery flu." Within hours it seems, this thing just sweeps across the country. People are working around the clock trying to find an antidote. Nothing is working. California. Oregon. Arizona. Florida. Massachusetts. It's as though it's just sweeping in from the borders.

And then, all of a sudden the news comes out. The code has been broken. A cure can be found. A vaccine can be made. It's going to take the blood of somebody who hasn't been infected, and so, sure enough, all through the Midwest, through all those channels of emergency broadcasting, everyone is asked to do one simple thing: "Go to your downtown hospital and have your blood tested. That's all we ask of you. And when you hear the sirens go off in your neighborhood, please make your way quickly, quietly, and safely to the hospitals."

Sure enough, when you and your family get down there late on that Friday night, there is a long line, and they've got nurses and doctors coming out and pricking fingers and taking blood and putting labels on it. Your wife and your kids are out there, and they take your blood type and they say, "Wait here in the parking lot and if we call your name, you can be dismissed and go home."

You stand around with your neighbors, wondering what in the world is going on, and that this is the end of the world. Suddenly a young man comes running out of the hospital screaming. He's yelling a name and waving a clipboard. What? He yells it again! And your son tugs on your jacket and says, "Daddy, that's me." Before you know it, they have grabbed your boy. "Wait a minute, hold it!" And they say, "It's okay, his blood is clean. His blood is pure. We want to make sure he doesn't have the disease. We think he has got the right blood type!"

Five tense minutes later, out come the doctors and nurses, crying and hugging one another … some are even laughing. It's the first time you have seen anybody laugh in a week, and an old doctor walks up to you and says, "Thank you, sir. Your son's blood type is perfect. It's clean, it is pure, and we can make the vaccine." As the word begins to spread all across that parking lot full of folks, people are screaming and praying and laughing and crying. But then the gray-haired doctor pulls you and you wife aside and says, "May we see you for a moment? We didn't realize that the donor would be a minor and we need … we need you to sign a consent form."

You begin to sign and then you see that the number of pints of blood to be taken is empty. "H-h-h-how many pints?" And that is when the old doctor's smile fades and he says, "We had no idea it would be a little child. We weren't prepared. We need it all."

"But-but... You don't understand! He's my only son!" 

"We are talking about the world here. Please sign."

"But can't you give him a transfusion?"

"If we had clean blood we would. Can you please sign? We're running out of time."

In numb silence you do. Then they say, "Would you like to have a moment with him before we begin?"

Could you walk back? Could you walk back to that room where he sits on a table saying, "Daddy? Mommy? What's going on?" Could you take his hands and say, "Son, your mommy and I love you, and we would never ever let anything happen to you that didn't just have to be. Do you understand that?" And when that old doctor comes back in and says, "I'm sorry, we've … we've got to get started. People all over the world are dying." Could you leave? Could you walk out while he is saying, "Dad? Mom? Dad? Why are you leaving me? Why … why have you forgotten me?"

And the next week,  when there is a ceremony to honor your son, and some people sleep through it, and others don't come because they have other things to do, And some folks come with a pretentious smile and just pretend to care, Would you want to jump up and say, " EXCUSE ME!! MY SON DIED FOR YOU! DON'T YOU EVEN CARE!?" 

I wonder if that is how God feels sometimes.

Father, seeing it from your eyes should break our hearts. Maybe now we can begin to comprehend the great love you have for us.  

A long overdue update!

Events are definitely in full swing at Catholic Central!  Between Sunday Masses for various events, football games, retreats, and everything else associated with High School life, it feels like I am constantly running around , and hardly have any time to rest... much less blog!  But a lot of things have been happening, so it's been fun.

CC's football team is currently 8-1 on the season, with the Catholic League championship trophy now safely in our hands.  the championship game was held at Ford Field, so it was neat to be inside an NFL stadium for the first time.  I can only imagine what that place must be like on a Lions game day! Hopefully I'll get a chance to experience that at some point.  We start State Playoffs this week, and we're looking like we should have a good run (especially if the team keeps playing like they did in the Catholic League championship game!)

Another first is that I attended my first NHL game.  One of the Basilians had tickets to see the Red Wings play the Ottawa Senators, and that was an incredible experience!  It's such a fast-paced game, and because are seats were so close to the ice, you definitely felt like you were a part of the action, especially when one of the defensemen shot a beautiful goal from right in front of where we were sitting!

I haven't done much traveling recently, but I did get the chance to go over to Windsor last night, and visit with a couple of the Basilians who are there, as well as get to meet some of the students involved with University of Windsor Campus Ministry.   Even though the program is only in its second year, it seems to be thriving quite nicely. Kudos to Fr. Chris Valka for all the time and effort he's put into starting the Campus Ministry program there!

That's about it for now.  I'm headed back to NM in less than 2 weeks for a friend's wedding.  Looking forward to seeing a bunch of my friends, and to getting some good green chile!